She Puts The Lotion In The Basket

I've been lubing up my arm with the lotion that's been in my desk since I brought it to work around the time I started. I need to get the peeling to stop so I can get my tattoo. As I was applying, I noticed that that the expiration date for the lotion was 10/00. October 2000? Wasn't that before the internet bubble burst? And what makes lotion expire, anyway? It still looks and feels like lotion, so it still is lotion. I think it means:

"throw me out and spend more money on a new version of me, because you aren't buying more of me fast enough!"

To whoever came up with this idea, FUCK YOU.

I feel better now.
And my skin is soft and supple.